“I may go to church but I can still take you down, fat a$$!”

Something very odd just happened to me and I’m still trying to process it.  But one thing stood out about the experience I feel God-driven to share.  And it comes down to a couple of key verses that are guiding lights in my Christian life.

“I may go to church but I can still take you down, fat a$$!”

That’s what a woman yelled at me outside a neighborhood church this Sunday morning as my husband and I were finishing up our daily morning dog walk.  As an Adventist, I attend church on Saturday mornings, so there was no evidence of my regular church attendance this morning.   I don’t run around with a badge that says Christian or Church-goer on it for the edification of those who don’t know me. 

I believe in witnessing to others through the way I live my life, letting what I say and do lead them to want to know more about why I live and act the way I do, and in that way attract them to a relationship with God.  So, needless to say, this person had no idea who I was, how I live my life, or what I believe.

Another thing I believe in is giving others the benefit of the doubt.  I never know what else may be going on or what things someone may have misunderstood. In this case, it’s possible she may have misinterpreted my actions.

See, we were on the sidewalk, walking past the church and, in the process, the entrance to the church parking lot.  We were absorbed in conversation, in particular trying to figure out if the squirrel we’d just seen race across the street a ways ahead of us was really a black squirrel or if its apparent coloring was just a trick of the light.  So we didn’t notice the truck waiting to turn into the parking lot until it pulled through the driveway behind us.  Once I realized what had happened, I turned to wave in apology for holding them up.  Maybe someone thought my wave was less a full-handed greeting and more a single fingered rebuke of some sort.  I don’t know.  Then, as we continued to walk, I lamented not having noticed the truck to my husband, motioning that it’s presence had gone right over my head.  Maybe the woman who shouted at me thought I was discussing her.  I don’t know.

What I do know is what she shouted at me once they parked the truck, in a church parking lot, with a pre-school aged girl I presume was her daughter on her hip, before walking into Sunday morning services. 

It wasn’t just the words that bothered me.  While I don’t like foul language and avoid it as much as I can myself (old, bad habits die hard) I know true believers who have an incredible relationship with Christ and truly foul vocabularies. It was the example. 

See, my husband has a true dislike of organized religions because of the hypocritical way so many so-called Christians act.  I understand his point.  So, when this woman yelled at me like that, whatever her reasons may have been, he reacted in a protective manner, as he always does.  While this serves to bring him closer to me, as it always does, I couldn’t help feeling a drop in the pit of my stomach at the thought of what the interaction would mean for his relationship with church, God, and Believers.  He continues to have my example, and others close to us, of what a true relationship with Christ is like.  Still… this is a wedge between him and Him.  What if it had been someone else on that sidewalk?  Someone without a lover of Christ in their lives?  Someone who was questioning the rightness of Christianity’s very existence?  What would that attack have meant to them?  Even if that person had been raging against the folks in the truck and denigrating them.

This entire incident reminded me very strongly of two central tenets of my Christian faith.  One is embodied in Romans 14:13-14, 1 Corinthians 8:8-10, 2 Corinthians 6:3-4 – as Paul repeatedly warns against letting our actions be a stumbling block to others, keeping them from Christ – as well as in Matthew 18:6-7.

Romans   

^“13 Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister. ¹⁴ I am convinced, being fully persuaded in the Lord Jesus, that nothing is unclean in itself. But if anyone regards something as unclean, then for that person it is unclean.”

1 Corinthians

^“8 But food does not bring us near to God; we are no worse if we do not eat, and no better if we do. ⁹ Be careful, however, that the exercise of your rights does not become a stumbling block to the weak. ¹⁰ For if someone with a weak conscience sees you, with all your knowledge, eating in an idol’s temple, won’t that person be emboldened to eat what is sacrificed to idols?”

2 Corinthians

^“3 We put no stumbling block in anyone’s path, so that our ministry will not be discredited. ⁴ Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses;”

Matthew

“6 but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him to have a heavy millstone hung around his neck, and to be drowned in the depth of the sea. 7 "Woe to the world because of its stumbling blocks! For it is inevitable that stumbling blocks come; but woe to that man through whom the stumbling block comes!”

I monitor my behavior on a daily basis because of my semi-public persona as a broadcast journalist.  But, that’s about simply staying employable.  This is about something so much more.  This is a test with eternal ramifications.  And it’s a test of our behavior as Christians on a daily basis.  When we let little things, perceived insults or real ones, arouse our anger, when we lash out at strangers, when we belittle others for whatever reason, we are becoming the stumbling blocks in others’ paths to Christ.

Which is why in Matthew 5 Christ counseled us to turn the other cheek.  This is the second tenet that guides my faith. 

He begins “38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’[a]39 But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. 40 And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well.” 

And then later adds, “43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor[i] and hate your enemy.’ 44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47 And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?”

This is the embodiment of what it means to be meek.  Those who are meek, He said in the beatitudes, will inherit the Earth.  I do not believe he was speaking of this earth, but the New Earth of the second coming and eternal life.  Yet, meekness is not easy.  Which is why we see the idea repeated time and again throughout the new testament, using different language each time.  The one that resonates the most with me is in Romans 12, when he tells us to bless those who persecute us. 

Romans 12:17-21: “17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”[d] says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:

“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
    if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”[e]

21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

For years now I’ve striven for caution in what comes out of my mouth (or fingertips when online).  I don’t always live up to my own standards.  I am a sinful person in a sinful world.  But I try.  This, however, is about more than making sure I remain employable as a broadcast journalist in the public eye.  This is about a much more permanent concern.  I do not want anything I say or do to keep others from Christ.

I do not know why this woman lashed out at me the way she did this morning.  Perhaps there is something in her life she needs help with right now.  But I know I do not have to respond in kind.  Instead, I can add her to my prayers.